“Mommy, when the baby gets here, can the baby sleep with me?”

Dear Baby,
This morning we woke up to a beautiful layer of snow on the ground, your big brother was so excited! Of course it quickly melted away but the hills are still spotted with white.
Big brother cannot wait to meet you! The other night he asked if when you got here, if you could sleep in his bed with him. He is always asking when you are going to grow because he can’t see you yet; you’re only the size of an apple seed.
Mommy has been looking at gear on the internet non-stop and has already bought your first baby blankets! Beige and green of course. (Mommy really wants you to be a girl. It was so hard for me not to buy the pink blankets!) I’ve already found the perfect diaper bag and stroller system for you.
Our first appointment is on January 20th. Mommy and daddy can’t wait for the moment we see your little heart-beat on the screen.
It’s already sunk in that I am now a mama of two! Our family is complete.
I love you to the moon and back,
Mommy

christmas eve

Shower. Pee on a stick. My plan for the morning. I originally planned to test Christmas Day, but I was getting too anxious.  I laid the test upside down and waited 5 hours. (Reality= 3 minutes.) Flipped it over and saw a huge positive and gasped.

The following thoughts ran through my head.

“SDKJFHEWILFUSDFLKBJH!!!!!!!!!!!”
“That was FAST.”
“That was easy…”
“Andrew is going to flip.”
“I can’t go on any rides at Disneyland.”
“Breathe.”

I ran downstairs and shouted to Gabe, “GUESS WHAT!!!!!! MOMMY HAS A BABY IN HER TUMMY!!!!!! YOU’RE GOING TO BE A BIG BROTHER!!!!!! OH MY GOSH HOW ARE WE GOING TO TELL YOUR DADDY!!!!!!!!!!!”

You could say I was a little excited.

We wrote daddy a card that said, “Dear Daddy, I am going to be a big brother! Merry Christmas. Gabe, big brother.” He wanted me to write big brother after his name, already so proud! We brought it to the office where Andrew and I work, and recorded the whole thing. He was speechless and had a few tears. It was perfect. And then he made me go to the store to buy another test! Ha! Of course it came up positive again. Overjoyed.

I called my best friends, Skyped with my mom and family in Washington (she cried!) went to Christmas Eve service at church, whispered to a few more people then at our family dinner, Gabe gave Grandma (Andrew’s mom) the card we gave daddy earlier. She was in shock, Andrew’s aunt screamed and we all hugged. What a huge blessing.

Today you are 5 weeks old and due to bless us with your presence late August.

I love you so much already, even though you make me feel like I’m going to throw up.

Love,
Mommy